tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-71803249989551828302024-02-20T00:37:25.907-08:00procrastinate?writenowJo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.comBlogger55125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-33922988559144349682012-07-13T05:54:00.000-07:002012-07-13T05:55:48.921-07:00Check it out.I've started a new blog under my writing name, so that I can link it to facebook and twitter and other social networking stuff.<br />
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So just toddle over to the new site for more of the usual standard of quality you've come to expect ; )<br />
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<a href="http://joantareauwrites.blogspot.com.au/">http://joantareauwrites.blogspot.com.au/</a><br />
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I won't be posting anymore over here. See you there.Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-80067580189913821352012-04-30T01:13:00.000-07:002012-04-30T01:13:15.177-07:00Writers Rock<br />
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<span lang="EN-AU">I was going to start my blog entry this
way:</span></div>
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<i><span lang="EN-AU">If
you hear a thumping sound, please don’t worry. It’s probably just the sound of
me repeatedly banging my head against the wall. Nothing to worry about, really.
<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">It was going to deteriorate from there into
a wholehearted whine. I’d had one of those weeks, due to both writing and
non-writing related angst. And the writing-related issues would basically have
justified tattooing the word <i>idiot</i> on
my forehead, because it was due to my own stupid fault and could be summed up
thus: <i>failed to read submission
guidelines</i>. Yep, the number one reason for form rejection of manuscripts.
No more to be said.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">Just as I was wondering why I even bothered,
something happened to lift my spirits. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">I was randomly selected for a 1000 word
crit by the highly talented Janice Hardy from her blog. Not only would I value her input into
my work, but the sheer big-heartedness of this gift made my day. She might be busting
a gut to finish her own MS, but still found the time to offer three readers her
personalised input. That’s the sort of generosity evident in the writer-verse. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">So instead of detailing evidence of my own
stupidity, I’ll sing the praises of the resources freely available to writers
in the blogosphere. Mainly because it’s far more interesting, but also because
I have gained so much, and been so inspired by the generosity of writers, it’s
high time for some appreciation. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">Now, eighteen-odd months ago, I had no idea
that writers blogged. Yep, and I’d never heard of the Beatles either. Or that
amazing wheel-thingo that might just catch on as a useful tool. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">Writers’ blogs have been a source of Ah-ha moments. The publishing industry might be cut-throat and
unforgiving. But instead of taking advantage of any opportunity to slag-off the
competition or jeopardise others’ chances of reaching the holy grail – writers’
(and agents’ and editors’) blogs are a shining example of sharing the skills
needed to make a piece of writing shine.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">So, in order of discovery, the amazing
blogs that changed my approach to writing. And my heartfelt thanks to all. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU"><a href="http://queryshark.blogspot.com.au/">Query
Shark</a></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">I’d never heard of a query before hitting
her home page. After a few days of devouring every entry and comment, my neurons
went firing in entirely new directions. I thought I knew how to summarise a
plot. I thought I could write a plot. This blog taught me I was wrong. If I
can’t answer these questions (Who is the MC? What do they want? What’s stopping
them getting it? What decision do they need to make to reach their goal? What
will happen if they don’t?) then there really is no plot. Simple? Yeah.
Obvious? No way. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU"> <a href="http://evileditor.blogspot.com.au/">evil editor</a></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">Oh, the hours of mirth! He taught me to not
take my plots too seriously. I have posted queries on his blog – not that any
stories were actually ready to query, but really to test how well my plot held
water. The guy is a genius for
identifying holes, (and lampooning them). Any he misses, his minions will
happily point out. I’ve been both a minion and a querier. And both experiences
have left me richer. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU"><a href="http://phoenixsullivan.blogspot.com.au/">Phoenix Sullivan</a></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">Not as well known as the others, but
honestly – a must-bookmark site for anybody considering self publishing on
Amazon/ Smashwords and so on. She has detailed her forays with unflinching
honesty. With the analytical brain of a scientist, she outlines her marketing
strategies, and demonstrates their effectiveness. I’m not ready to launch my
babies into the Amazon jungle – yet –
but when I do I will go back and memorise her approaches.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU"><a href="http://missedperiodsandothergrammarscares.blogspot.com.au/">Missed
Periods and Other Grammar Scares</a></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">Hilarious grammar advice. And no, those
aren’t three words randomly selected by one of those poetry-writing programmes,
I mean it. Check it out.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU"><a href="http://blog.janicehardy.com/">The
Other Side Of The Story</a> </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">For a fresh take on the fundamental skills
of writing and self editing, Janice Hardy’s blog is the most comprehensive, simplest
and fresh blog I’ve seen. It’s as informative as a writing course. I especially
like the “red flags” she suggests one searches for in one’s manuscript to
identify areas that need tightening. I’ve followed her advice and strengthened
my writing immensely as a result. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU"><a href="http://misssnarksfirstvictim.blogspot.com.au/">Miss Snark's First Victim</a></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">This lady, the anonymous Authoress, must be
an Olympic-level networker, because she has enticed a truckload of agents to
come to her blog and take their pick from fifty hopefuls’ queries or openings
in her monthly Secret Agent comp. You’d expect the agents to shy away, given
they have slushpiles the size of Everest, but, no. They actually read through
them and post comments about why/ why not. Fascinating – particularly as a
lucky writer might actually end up with a deal as a result. Real-life drama!</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-AU">Any blogs you care to add to the above?</span></div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-20386117204678793872012-04-17T04:25:00.003-07:002012-04-17T04:38:17.588-07:00Multi Myth<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Too many competing demands? Twenty four hours not enough? Your solution is easy - Multitask! </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">What a lovely, seductive word it is, suggesting that if we were just a little more canny, we would be able to juggle our responsibilities in a smooth synergy.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Which is crap. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Whenever I’ve tried to speak to someone watching their fave sport on tv, I’ve had the wonderful experience of being both invisible and inaudible. Whenever I’ve been on the phone to someone and an interesting headline popped up on the screen, I’ve turned deaf for a few seconds and had to ask them to repeat themselves.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Sure, the human brain is a complex machine capable of deep insights and creativity. But it evolved to control only one set of legs, one set of eyes and ears and a pair of hands, which often worked in collaboration.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I don’t know if the research evidence ever supported multi tasking as a worthwhile way to process information, but recent research into productivity and output has been very clear. Multi taking is multi time wasting. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Evidence.</span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">But that’s not really new. Back in the 30s when workplace psychology was still new, the studies into the stress-effectivenss relationship revealed a clear trend – low level stress led to minimal output. Increasing the stress increased output. When stress reached a particular point, effectiveness plateau’d off. When more stress was added, output took a nosedive. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">In other words, there is an optimum level of stress that maximises performance. Don’t you love it when research results are perfectly consistent with your intuition? They even gave it an important sounding title – the Yerkes-Dodgson inverted-U shaped curve.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-AU">But what is stress, exactly?</span></b><span lang="EN-AU"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Many things can create it, but for the purpose of this post, I’ll focus on one important component - decision making. Making any decision at all is stressful. Anything that makes us stop and evaluate our options, consider the consequences and then choose increases our body’s stress response, even if it’s to a low level and beneath our awareness. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Here’s the bit that might come as a surprise: even making a pleasant decision creates stress. Cheesecake or chocolate mousse?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Which do I miss out upon? Do I want to appear to be a glutton and have both? OMG – the pressure – someone choose for me! </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Another point about stress is that it cumulates as decisions accumulate. So I might be able to juggle three routine tasks simultaneously – eating my breakfast, with one eye on my kids whilst chatting to the hub is achievable, because there are few decisions in this process, and decisions are routine. That’s the extent of my multi tasking ability - and most people's, too.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">But at work I have competing demands. Each of which requires a series of decisions. For example, I might need to write a report, try to catch somebody on the phone, prepare material for an upcoming meeting and deal with a new email that’s pinged into the in-box. Whilst politely telling a colleague that I’d be delighted to answer their questions (just not right now). </span></span><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Verdana','sans-serif'; font-size: 7.5pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-no-proof: yes;"><shape alt="Angry Businessman" id="Picture_x0020_4" o:spid="_x0000_i1025" style="height: 127.5pt; mso-wrap-style: square; visibility: visible; width: 132.75pt;" type="#_x0000_t75"><imagedata o:title="Angry Businessman" src="file:///C:\Users\dse\AppData\Local\Temp\msohtmlclip1\01\clip_image002.jpg"><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></imagedata></shape></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Fairly typical demands. My thought processes might go like this: does this sentence in this report sound like I’m blaming somebody? Oh, I really have to speak to x, do I leave another voice mail message or try phoning again in 30 minutes? I’ll phone later, so I’ll need to write a reminder to call again. Now, how much time before the meeting? I need to email everybody a copy of this information at least an hour before it starts. Which folder is that info in? Oh look - a message in the in-box. Should I open it now or later? The subject line is ambiguous. And what is my colleague wanting anyway?</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">A typical workplace will expect us to be able to glide seamlessly between such activities. The problem is - each time we swap from one to another, we need to re-orient to the task, recall our place, and organise the next step to tackle it. Every time we grapple with these decisions, stress rises, and time is wasted.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Chances are, I’ll forget to phone the person until 5 minutes before leaving, make a fool of myself at the meeting, miss an obvious error in my report, waste my time figuring out the email is totally irrelevant and snap at my colleague.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I guess that’s why the buzz words are shifting from multi tasking to prioritising. Most tasks involve many simultaneous decisions, so doing one at a time is far more efficient than three.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">So how does that relate to writing?</span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Creating is a complex task. Even if the only thing you are doing is writing, it is still an exercise in multitasking. Think about the process: word choice is a constant question. Avoiding passive verbs and clichés. Choosing the most effective punctuation (comma? Semi colon? Break it into two sentences?) Will another set of italics will make the manuscript look amateurish. How much internalisation is needed now? What about pacing? The overarching plot needs to be considered at all times. Every character’s motivation is there, too. Does this passage actually advance the plot or is it an excuse for a very clever joke? </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Feeling stressed yet?</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Writers live in the real world, too, and have other demands on their time and attention. If I’m stressing about the symptoms my cat was displaying (should I take it to the vet? They might not be able to see her for a few days, she might get worse), while wondering why my friend has not responded to a suggestion to meet on Saturday (did I miss a text response? – better check), keeping an eye on whether the carpet cleaner is actually having an effect on that stain (or will it discolour the fabric?), and that I haven’t spoken to my mother for a few days (she had a slight cough, has it turned into pneumonia?) – then my writing will grind to a snail’s pace.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">What I’ve learnt is ... unless I focus totally on my writing, my precious time just runs down the drain. So the kitchen timer is my friend here. I set it for an hour, and in that hour I only write. (Ok, I pause to sip coffee, but I’m not allowed to make another cup). I’ve made a decision to delay all other decisions until the hour is up. If I’m fortunate, I can allocate another hour later in the day.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Roald Dahl</strong> apparently had a special writing hut, where he would sit for two blocks of two hours per day. He had five sharpened pencils ready as he began work, knowing that it would take him two hours to wear down the five nibs. This guy didn’t even want a break to sharpen his pencils! Way to go!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-AU">Stating the obvious</span></b><span lang="EN-AU">.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Sports Psychology experts train top athletes by stating what sounds pretty obvious. They train on focussing only on the one shot or move they need to achieve at that precise moment. That action, and only that one action, is their entire world at that second. To continually be mindful of the basics – eye on ball – before attempting any fancy stuff. To forget about the score and how the outcome of the game will affect them. To ignore the big picture and think only about what is to be achieved at this precise moment. These techniques are employed at <strong>Olympic</strong> level. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">What I’ve taken from that is to focus only one aspect of writing at a time. At first, just telling the <span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;"> story in my own voice. And when I revise, I will only focus on the word choice and grammar, or the relevance of a section to the overarching structure. One aspect at a time during my alloted time.</span></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">That task is my life at that instant</span>. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The least helpful thing to do is to start questioning my decision to write, or asking "who would read anything I write?"<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What a great way to sabotage the process. Shove these doubts to one side and keep going. The “just do it” philosophy is actually helpful. Save the doubt for when you're thinking of your goals.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Focusing on each step, one word at a time, sentence by sentence, paragraph by paragraph, will get the narrative finished. </span></span></div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-61581941976259293422012-04-05T18:52:00.003-07:002012-04-06T01:50:18.927-07:00Reading Like A Writer....The Princess Bride<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Since starting to write seriously, I’ve noticed that my approach to books has changed. I still love to immerse myself in the author’s world. And have an immense sense of gratitude to all writers for their ability to transport me. But now, even when savouring the prose, I simultaneously take a little peek at the mechanisms employed. A look at how the magic works.</span></span></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">And I will share my musings with those who read the blog (yes, both of you!) in a series of book reviews, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Reading Like A Writer</b>. Reviews with an emphasis on what, as I writer, I have learnt from the author’s techniques.</span></span></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">And I’ll start with the classic fairy tale parody– <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">The Princess Bride</b>, by William Goldman. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Summary: Farm boy Westley seeks his true love, Buttercup, who has been kidnapped by evil Prince Humperdink.</span></em></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; font-family: Arial; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img height="170px" src="http://www.princessbrideforever.com/images/banner-home.png" width="400px" /></span><span style="color: #717d7d; font-size: 10.5pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-no-proof: yes;"></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">“It’s still my favourite book in the world. And more than ever, I wish I’d written it”. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">And so Goldman commences his story with his tongue firmly planted in his cheek. He claims to have abridged a classic story from Florin (where his father was said to be born). The first 35 pages detail his introduction to the story as a child, and how the story, read aloud to him, inspired his subsequent love of reading. It’s all plausible, and, had I known there never was a country called Florin, would have gone along with it. (By coincidence, I read it on April 1<sup>st</sup>). </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Goldman describes his search for a copy of the long-out-of-print book <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Princess Bride</i> for his son’s birthday. To his dismay, it’s a dry tale. His father had skipped through the boring bits and read the adventure parts to him. Thereby inspiring him to abridge and release the new version to a modern audience (and add dry elements of his own). The plausibility is ramped up by Goldman weaving autobiographical fact in his fiction; his work as a novelist and Hollywood screenwriter, and had written Marathon Man and other blockbusters. Easily verifiable.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The epilogue is a description of the legal battles between him and the estate of the ersatz Morgenstern, the alleged author of the piece, and excerpts from the sequel, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Buttercup’s Baby</i>. To be honest, a little tiresome.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I’m not sure why he chose this device. Perhaps he wanted to add a dimension to the parody by including a layer of pseudo-intellectualism? Or just test the audiences’ gullability.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At one point, he invites readers to write to the publisher and request a passage he wished to add to the narrative, but which the author’s estate barred. Wikipedia reports that “many” readers actually did so. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Narrator’s Voice</span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Between these bookends, is the story within a story, told by S. Morenstern; like Lemony Snicket, the narrator is a character in the story. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-no-proof: yes;"><img height="320px" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-T3N1g6UUbYw/TwLVCZFOktI/AAAAAAAAB4U/JoSrwytj_6U/s320/inigo.jpeg" width="240px" /></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">He tells a farce, a parody. An over-the-top adventure featuring larger than life characters and situations. Morgenstern’s voice is swashbuckling, bombarding the reader with one grand claim after another. Despicable bad guys, heroic good guys, landscapes lurking with danger. His descriptive sentences are adventures in themselves, long and winding. I’m surprised no kitchen sink was featured. The story grabs you by the throat and sweeps you in. And stands alone without the foreword and epilogue.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Telling.</span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The prose is bold; the verbs, hyperactive. Goldman doesn’t shy away from the antagonists’ backstories. He describes their travails in detail with his usual gusto. And portrays them, not as stupid henchmen, but as the Best In the World at their particular <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>crafts – swordsman, wrestler, genius. Unbeatable. Higher stakes for our hero. Ridiculous, hilarious. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Writers are constantly told to avoid telling in favour of showing. This story can be taken as an example of “good telling”, simply because the narrator’s voice is so strong. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">As an example of telling: </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Fire swamps are, of course, entirely misnamed. As to why this has happened, nobody knows, though probably the colourful quality of the two words together is enough. Simply, there are swamps which contain a large percentage of sulphur and other gas bubbles that burst continually into flame. They are covered within lush giant trees that shadow the ground, making the flame bursts seem particularly dramatic. Because they are dark they are continually moist, thereby attracting the standard insect and alligator community that prefers a moist climate</i>.”</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">This is reminiscent of the voice used in Hitch Hiker’s Guide To The Galaxy, when the Guide’s voice explained an outrageous point with encyclopaedic understatement.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Complications and more complications.</span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">If, as a writer, you occasionally wonder whether you are making things too tough for your character, just flick through a few pages, and you’ll see, nah. Goldman demonstrates the maxim of constantly throwing barriers in the MC’s path. The stakes are continually raised. At one point, the hero dies. But that’s doesn’t hinder Westley’s success.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">There’s the lesson, writers! Adventure involves creating brave, highly skilled, MCs with a noble goal... and torturing them, unremittingly. Hold their heads under water and as soon as they come up for air, give them another sound dunking. And make the water poisonous and inhabited with carnivorous fish and eye-sucking eels. Then give the hero the ability to breathe through his ears... then immerse the ears, too. And so on.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">But it’s not all perfect.</span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">My gripe is Buttercup, the heroine. She is nothing more than Westley’s prize, and really has nothing going for her other than her beauty. Passive and desirable, her role is limited to inspiring Westley to keep going and rescue her from Prince Humperdink. Ugh! Yeah, sure, the story is a parody, and she’s not the world’s first useless fairytale heroine. But this was written in 1973, not 1793. And if the reader’s prepared to swallow Westley becoming a master swordsman in two years when his opponent (the world’s best swordsman) <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>took twenty to reach the standard, then giving little Buttercup the ability to karate-kick her captors in the kidneys would not be completely out of synch with the plot, even if this was before karate. Especially as it was before karate.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Overall impression. Fun. Good to read as model for hyperbole. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">And if you want to contribute a review in this style, please contact me at joann_s [at] yahoo [dot] com</span></span></div><strong></strong>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-25539260190770654732012-03-31T16:05:00.003-07:002012-04-01T01:28:52.183-07:00Motivation tip #423<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Writers read. Lots, possibly too much.That’s a given. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Sometimes we read crap. As writers, I think we’re tolerant. We can often find some merit in a book, even if it’s the interesting use of a metaphor on page 21. But not all the time. One of the hazards of cracking open the pages of a book is that we’ll never regain the time invested in ploughing through it if it happens to be a stinker. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I was going to say it’s better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick, but that’s not true. Reading poor writing may feel like that.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I’m going to suggest a procrastination-busting idea. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Start off by recalling the last poorly written book you endured. And for the sake of the exercise, this needs to be fiction published as a physical book by a company. Indie’s ok, but not self pubbed.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">If the story you’re thinking of aroused strong passions, such as disgust, it’s not what I want. I’ll argue that if it was able to stir anything, it involved a reasonable standard of writing. If you shrieked at the description of the torture of small puppies, (and stuffed the book through a meat grinder, before burning it and dancing on the ashes), then the author got to you. No author can ask for more.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> And it's not the response I'm seeking. </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I’m referring to writing that fails to keep your interest. When you read a few lines and find your eye sliding down, off the page. The sort of book that you only persist with in the belief that something’s going to happen. Eventually. And you give up when it becomes patently obvious it won’t.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Why am I asking you to torture yourself and recall something so mediocre that its only merit was it was a great cure for insomnia? Dont waste the experience! Use it.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Here’s what I’m suggesting.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Stand the book up somewhere prominent in your work-area. (Or a photocopy of the cover if it’s a library book) </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Repeat the following: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">the author had the guts to persist with this nonsense. The author kept going until it was finished. The author had enough faith to not abandon it. An editor loved it enough to believe it was worth taking a risk on and..... publishing.</i> (You remember publishing? That wonderful form of validation that’s been your dream since you were an embryo?)</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">If that clown can do it, so can I.</span></span></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Because <strong><u>nothing</u></strong> gets published without a tonne of effort being put into it. Editors and agents receive a gazillion submissions every millisecond. A work that makes it to the bookshelves has been nurtured and loved and fed and massaged. Hours of patience were invested in it. You’ll never know how many times the author came close to abandoning it, but the evidence is there: it was never abandoned.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">When you find the call of twitter/Facebook/ blogs/games/snack when you’re not hungry/tv distracting you when you want to write... stop. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Look at Crappy Book. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">And repeat the above.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Great writing is inspirational. Pathetic writing might be depressing, but it has its uses. </span></span><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">So excuse me, I’ll wade through Chapter 15 of my WIP again, and see what I can change. If it ever gets published, I'd hate its ony use in life to motivate others in that way....</span></span></div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-72068940329894749472012-02-10T02:08:00.000-08:002012-02-10T02:08:36.079-08:00Sprints and marathonsWhen I was first grappling with the whole concept of writing seriously for publication, I felt I had to be a writing slut. Or as much of a slut as possible when writing Good Clean Fun. Any call for writing for kids, and I was there, putting out my prose, enticing the editors to pick up my manuscript and have their way with it. <br />
<br />
I figured short story creds were a quick way to plump up the bio. But... every call for short stories for kids had a limit of 500 words. Damn! How can you arrange 500 words in a manner that tells a satisfying story? <br />
<br />
Horses for courses. I figured I was a middle-distance runner. Five hundred word sprints? Fughedabout it. Fifty thousand word marathons? Uh-huh. My range was between 7 and 20K - chapter books and earlier MG stories, and that was that. I could see it was limiting my market potential. Some ideas for stories might be more suitable for an older audience, but there was no way I could top 50K. So that was that.<br />
<br />
Stupid idea.<br />
<br />
But since I was hungry for some publications, my first goal was to tackle the sprint. Forcing myself to squeeze a story to a 500 word limit was one of the best writery things I'd done. It didn't come easy. Firstly, I had to tell a story in a single scene. I learnt this after writing a few 500 word three-act stories. They were the written equivalent of "I'm on a boat - now I'm on a horse" minus the eye candy. They were like a movie shot with a hand-held camera. Jumpy and disjointed <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(better analogy). It was unfair on multi-scene narratives to force them into 500 words.<br />
<br />
Telling a story within a single scene was actually easier than expected, but these scenes tended to be longer than 500 words, often topping 1000. Solution? Get the writing scythe. And I edited. And cut and pruned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I made tough decisions about what I actually needed to say. The finished story flowed far more smoothly within its 500 word boundary. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><br />
<br />
There have been two rewards. <br />
<br />
Firstly, I have produced a total of 5 short stories of less than 500 words, three of which were accepted for publication. The two rejected ones were stories I knew were weaker (perhaps poorly resolved) and even when complete, I knew they weren’t quite right. But I hit the send button in a moment of recklessness. <br />
<br />
Nevertheless, I had met my goal and attained some pub creds. <br />
<br />
Secondly, my writing is tighter as a result of such discipline. I now write my novels as a series of (up to) 500 word scenes. Sure, it’s an arbitrary number, but it keeps me on my toes. Each makes a contribution to the story. I view them as a single step. Some require considerably less than 500 words to tell their piece, and that’s ok. A few get linked into a chapter – and with more editing, the 5 x 500 word structure gets hidden. And my stories are getting longer. <br />
<br />
My next goal is to link more to write a marathon! - I'll letcha know when I'm done.Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-90125130354691867402012-02-01T04:10:00.000-08:002012-02-01T04:15:02.076-08:00My Own Secret StoryEarly last year, my short story "My Own Secret Dinosaur", was accpeted into an anthology, "Extinct Doesn't Mean Forever". It was a thrilling experience, as it was my first published short. <br />
<br />
I write under the pen name of Jo Antareau. For those who know me in "real life", you might see a phonetic similarity between that and my actual name. Not that you can spell it easily, but, hey, I spend half my life spelling my real name, too.<br />
<br />
<img height="135px" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiO-CRXp4bHUpdu4sgNci5XxUkMj9zx-zHZChevQ_p15XnQJ3UZEm_NpR73kkIevagts_ceUxxjmzfkpcX47dYudwHZNP3DhM0w5qKThiCGl7GTuVv0ydQjnup4qK3EhW8dGcOsztZjmeo/s1600/Extinct+Cover.jpg" width="90px" /><br />
I was totally blown away by the quality of the stories in the anthology, it was humbling to see my tale of a kid trying to keep a baby dinosaur secret included with some really well written and intriguing stories. They are all awesome, but I'm not telling you which one is my fave! Each story has been given a new cover, see below. Mine's kinda cute, yeah?<br />
<br />
<br />
To promote the antho, the shorts have been released as stand-alone novellas on Amazon, and some will be available FREE. Watch this spot for details<br />
<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> </div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiN8fCL46lRha0XQ4NHa_Huo3PyNG4Sv8zAXKjjKEV7mVahDKUFCGXYdYbLxPOrqqFE0FD1FnbzS5Xy_VwvQE-ofqLrMo4xiHEXqDFO0XEiH7LaVjf1gkTVp0o329XeXE8YXGWzp5IG1Ew/s1600/extinct+cover+montage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480px" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiN8fCL46lRha0XQ4NHa_Huo3PyNG4Sv8zAXKjjKEV7mVahDKUFCGXYdYbLxPOrqqFE0FD1FnbzS5Xy_VwvQE-ofqLrMo4xiHEXqDFO0XEiH7LaVjf1gkTVp0o329XeXE8YXGWzp5IG1Ew/s640/extinct+cover+montage.jpg" width="640px" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;">And, I get to participate in a blog hop with the other authors, which is fun. Check out my team mates' blogs, below:</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://chrystallathoma.wordpress.com/about/">http://chrystallathoma.wordpress.com/about/</a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://mckoaladays.blogspot.com.au/">http://mckoaladays.blogspot.com.au/</a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://cornerkick.blogspot.com.au/2012/01/another-free-story.html">http://cornerkick.blogspot.com.au/2012/01/another-free-story.html</a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://fallslikesnow.blogspot.com.au/2012/01/my-story-connect-was-published-last.html">http://fallslikesnow.blogspot.com.au/2012/01/my-story-connect-was-published-last.html</a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://exxceptiondraft.tumblr.com/post/16784313123/stories-from-the-extinct-doesnt-mean-forever">http://exxceptiondraft.tumblr.com/post/16784313123/stories-from-the-extinct-doesnt-mean-forever</a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-91934659181918709802012-01-25T21:33:00.000-08:002012-01-25T21:33:00.903-08:00Reviving a Saggy Plot<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Stuck for plot ideas?</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Does your story seem a little thin, and you need some action to pump it up? Scrabbling for new ways to torture your MC (and cast) a little more before they reach the satisfying conclusion? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">What you need is..... my plot-twist generator. It’s free to use, and for your convenience, I’ve included it below.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">All you need to do is pick a number between 1 and 17, a letter between A and T, and a second number between 1 and 17. Then jam the three together in that order, and look it up. I’ve done the sums, and ended up with a staggering 5440 combinations of possible twists. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">You might end up with “The main character impregnates a wealthy relative”. Wow! Your readers never saw that coming! So what if your main character is female and the wealthy relative is 92? Go do a bit of research about IVF technology and stop whining. This is plot gold, I tell ya!</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">You can pick the same number twice, but the result might end up a little surreal. But that’s ok, if you’re a clever writer you embrace surreal, and follow that route to a plumper, more satisfying read. And the result may not be more convoluted than some books I’ve read lately. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Your otherwise lacklustre period romance might benefit from the introduction of an extraterrestrial to the plot. Or you might need to go back and write in a butler for your struggling farmer family. But, as I’ve said, that’s no hassle to a clever writer like you.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">And if you’re really stuck for ideas, repeat the process five times and you’ll come up with a reasonable narrative. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The Plot Twist Generator</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Pick two of these:</span> </span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">1.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The Main character</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">2.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The antagonist</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">3.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The main character’s faithful sidekick</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">4.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The MC’s love interest</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">5.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The MC’s love rival</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">6.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The MC’s ex-</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">7.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The antagonist’s sidekick</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">8.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The power player (that’s writer talk for a secondary character that has information or power to help or hinder the MC, such as Dumbledore in the HP series)</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">9.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The illegitimate child</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">10.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The MC’s long-lost father</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">11.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The MC’s mother</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">12.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The MC’s boss</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">13.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">A wealthy relative </span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">14.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The butler</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">15.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">An old gypsy</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">16.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">A spy</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">17.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">An extraterrestrial</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; text-indent: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;"> Pick one of these:</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">A.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Overhears a secret regarding</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">B.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">rescues</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">C.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Is discovered with a smoking gun over the dead body of</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">D.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Fights with </span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">E.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Impregnates</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">F.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Kills</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">G.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Contracts an illness from</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">H.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Kidnaps</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Runs over </span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">J.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Has a brief fling with</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">K.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Finds a stolen item in the possession of </span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">L.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Falls in love with</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">M.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Misunderstands</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">N.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">gets framed by</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">O.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">reads a letter addressed to</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">P.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Loses a big bet against</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Q.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Gets trapped in a burning building with</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">R.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Disguises him/her self as</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">S.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Gets drunk with</span></span></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 1in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">T.</span><span style="font: 7pt 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">blackmails</span></span></div>So, feedback.....Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-41584261216439347942012-01-13T02:40:00.000-08:002012-01-13T02:40:31.529-08:00Procrastinating right now!Anybody wold think I was trying to scare people away from this blog, as it's been a neglected little creature these past few weeks.<br />
No excuses, just procrastination. <br />
And if you want a moral tale about the dangers of procrastination, I shall share.<br />
A few days after Christmas, an item aired on the news. A jokey item about a firestation suffering some fire damage. Not a due to a major blaze, but one that nevertheless caused red faces, and I dont mean from the heat. The fire led to the discovery that the fire station lacked a working smoke detector. You know, those things that fire fighters continually preach about that could save lives? <br />
Ha! Shoemaker's kids go barefoot, psychologist's kids are brats and so on.<br />
Aha, I thought! I could work this anecdote into the blog about practicing what one preaches. You know, especially about silencing the little voices quash the urgency to do it NOW.<br />
Well, I let it go. And now I cant find a reference to it anywhere on the web, so I'm not able to post a nice little link to the item, and I look like I'm not being truthful. Jokey news reports tend to vanish like that, probably aided and abetted by the fire brigade in this case. The story's about three weeks old anyway.<br />
So my anecdote looks lame. Please give me a kick in the commentary section - I need to hear how you guys stop block the voice that says "Ah, do it tomorrow".Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-13392018272914493492011-12-24T23:23:00.000-08:002011-12-25T15:20:23.387-08:00Dreaming of a white one?<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Christmas comes in the middle of summer here. Some insist on forcing down a roast lunch with all the trimmings, but many are conceding that in hot weather, this is a tad masochistic. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
<span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">We had a barbecue lunch followed by platters heaped with watermelon, mangoes, cherries and stone fruit. Summer fruit....my idea of heaven, bury me now.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
<span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I’ve certainly had hotter Christmas days than today, it reached 30 Celsius (that’s 86 Fahrenheit) in Melbourne. But it was so humid and muggy that, well, lots of rehydration was needed. We were all quite merry, in a sluggish, laid-back way! Even the <s>energy balls</s> kids were lethargic. Or maybe their shenanigans didn’t bother us.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Then at 3:00PM a storm swept through the city. The temperature plummeted and I initially thought drunken revellers were chucking stones. As it turned out, it wasn’t human hands – those cloud-dwelling creatures were. We had hail. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
<span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Golf-ball sized chunks of ice bombarded the yard. Some bounced off the neighbour’s roof into our courtyard. As we’d covered the courtyard ground with recycled rubber matting, the hailstones bounced around the small space, some smashing spectacularly against the house wall. It looked like the inside of a popcorn maker. Within minutes, the ground was white. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRhb8ydj9hJyY33BwjQLNVrX_HxG2EKekusByiiTf3X2lsp6BFTLd1bfIrrTYcWOEDgNkpeVQI0RCDOhM-0n-fctxOF8boCQNjmeO4DXP2wW9s4RHbGuptn-X5JfZyYRel84vjjp4rtcRw/s1600/white+christmas.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200px" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRhb8ydj9hJyY33BwjQLNVrX_HxG2EKekusByiiTf3X2lsp6BFTLd1bfIrrTYcWOEDgNkpeVQI0RCDOhM-0n-fctxOF8boCQNjmeO4DXP2wW9s4RHbGuptn-X5JfZyYRel84vjjp4rtcRw/s200/white+christmas.JPG" width="150px" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The kids’ excitement was short lived as they discovered that getting pelted with ice actually hurt. We stressed over the cat’s whereabouts, but when it was over she sauntered in, her fur completely dry.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
<span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">But all those dreaming of a white Christmas got one. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
<span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Hope you guys got what you wanted, too.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-4867322367174100822011-12-07T22:02:00.001-08:002011-12-08T02:00:51.205-08:00just an observation<span lang="EN-AU" style="font-family: 'Arial','sans-serif'; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-AU; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;">The word “hysteria” means “womb” (just think of the word hysterectomy, if you don’t believe me). </span><br />
<br />
<span lang="EN-AU" style="font-family: 'Arial','sans-serif'; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-AU; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;">Yep, way back when the study of mental health was in its infancy in the last century, it was deemed that such irrational, uncontrolled excessive emotional behaviour was purely feminine. So it was plainly obvious to the learned gentlemen that its origin must be in the uterus. </span><br />
<br />
<span lang="EN-AU" style="font-family: 'Arial','sans-serif'; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-AU; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;">First coined in the days of Hippocrates, and largely forgotten, Freud repopularised the term and wrote several serious papers about it. Thanks, Sigmund – it obviously wasn’t enough that we were supposed to envy those other things.</span>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-80864390271043354772011-11-27T04:06:00.000-08:002011-11-27T04:06:12.600-08:00Had to share..<span style="font-family: 'Georgia','serif';"><span style="color: magenta;">The writers’ prayer.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'Georgia','serif';">God grant me the serenity <br />
to accept the words that don’t need to be changed; <br />
courage to edit the things that do;<br />
and wisdom to know the difference. </span><br />
<br />
- sorry, I cant attribute this quote to anybody. If you know who corrupted the Serenity Prayer, lemme know.Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-13191189223484848452011-11-16T19:09:00.000-08:002011-11-17T00:03:55.507-08:00Search for Perfection<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">On a cold evening there’s nothing I enjoy better than to curl up on the sofa with a warm cup of something soothing and read the telephone directory. Not just any directory – hey, I have standards here – but the paper version of the White Pages. </span><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The drama! The intrigue! The humour! I laugh out loud, and diligently resist the temptation to skip to the end to see how it turns out. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
<span lang="EN-AU" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My husband questions my mental health. It’s <strong>research,</strong> people, truly. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
<span lang="EN-AU" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I want the perfect name for my characters. I’ll know it when I find it. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><strong>Scientifically Proven</strong></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-AU">Names are important! </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-AU">One’s name has an impact on one’s self-perception and the path one chooses in life. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-AU">A study of names in medical and legal professions showed there was a slightly higher proportion of doctors with the name <strong>Doctor</strong> or with the letters <strong>"Doc"</strong> in their names and lawyers called <strong>Lawyer</strong> or with <strong>Law</strong> in their names, than predicted by chance. </span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-AU">The study is linked </span><span lang="EN-AU"><a href="http://www.ingentaconnect.com/content/maney/nam/2010/00000058/00000002/art00002">here </a></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>if you could be bothered. </span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-AU">Furthermore, doctors called <strong>Wee</strong> were more likely to practice Urology than other branches of medicine. I couldn't make THAT up.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’ve noticed these trends myself. A <strong>dietician</strong> called <strong>Candy</strong>, a <strong>veterinary</strong> called <strong>Dr Catt</strong>. A lawyer called <strong>Conquest </strong>(although I seriously wonder whether the latter changed their name by deed poll to sound macho and go-hard. If I were choosing legal representation, I’d be more likely to select somebody with a winning name, rather than say, Slack or Dowdy. I just wouldn’t date somebody called Conquest. Or Slack or Dowdy.)</span><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-font-kerning: 18.0pt;"></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-outline-level: 1; text-indent: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-indent: 0in;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoh1THTOwOBKnecpnTzemifP_KTSlach2DsVp9mfcH7RvvACOdfV0cRaFZb60mXJ_jgMSZEtRlxjOjH0xTGaUEbBJtF3Ug8dSOF2kEf5zYCPikAmikrQrMmcHg47FB7XyPaaLvJLvN1msF/s1600/umbridge.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" hda="true" height="200px" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoh1THTOwOBKnecpnTzemifP_KTSlach2DsVp9mfcH7RvvACOdfV0cRaFZb60mXJ_jgMSZEtRlxjOjH0xTGaUEbBJtF3Ug8dSOF2kEf5zYCPikAmikrQrMmcHg47FB7XyPaaLvJLvN1msF/s200/umbridge.jpg" width="185px" /></span></a><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Writers have used this for years; suggesting personality traits in characters through their names. Rowling was a champion at including puns in her characters’ names. My favourite was <strong>Dolores Umbridge</strong>, from Order of the Phoenix. Dolores means pain and umbrage means both shade and to take offense.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes, she was an offensive pain who cast a shadow on life at Hogwart’s.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-indent: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-indent: 0in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">So back to my telephone directory ramblings. </span><br />
<br />
<span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">I’ve come across names that give me a chuckle at the image of a character it inspires.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<br />
<span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">I would only use the family name <strong>Sweet</strong> for an absolutely foul character. <strong>Block </strong>would <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>be a henchman.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But these are quite basic. My mind boggled at what a person called Ear would be like ( a spy, maybe?).</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-indent: 0in;"><br />
<span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">How would you picture people with the following names (all currently listed in the Melbourne White Pages)?</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.6in; text-indent: 0in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Loveless</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.6in; text-indent: 0in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Bright</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.6in; text-indent: 0in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Strawbridge</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.6in; text-indent: 0in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Cheers</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.6in; text-indent: 0in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Shade</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.6in; text-indent: 0in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Mansion</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.6in; text-indent: 0in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Stallion (ok, I got a giggle here)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.6in; text-indent: 0in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Slockwitch (Dickensian)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.6in; text-indent: 0in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Smallman</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-indent: 0in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I eventually found the perfect name for my character: Perfect. Or so I thought, until I saw the next name –Perfetto. Perfectionist and pretentious.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Suited her. Perfectly. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-indent: 0in;"><span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Tell me – would these games be possible with the e-directory?</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-indent: 0in;"><br />
<span lang="EN-AU" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-size: 6.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman';">BTW - sorry if I've used your name here. No offense intended. But seriously, dude, consider changing it!</span></div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-33086910853069085662011-11-08T22:38:00.000-08:002011-11-09T03:52:33.751-08:00NaNoWriWha?<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Having hung around writerish blogosphere for some time now, I was vaguely aware of an annual writing event, </span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>National Novel Writing Month.</strong> Kind of like an orgy in which quantity is the key.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">As I understand it (not that I've been researching) published and wannabe writers aim to complete a 50,000 word novel in the one month, averaging about <strong>1600 words per day</strong>. Ok, sounds great for some who have time and/or stamina, and horrifically stressful for those who don’t. I think they've adopted and adapted the Nike Just Do It philosophy. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">As it happens, November is a quiet month for me, work wise. I’m self employed but rely mainly on one company for work, and they are super busy in the middle of the year, and slow down between November to February. I was well aware of this when I agreed to work for them, and allowed for the lull. I took on more projects than was wise over the busy period, knowing I could postpone some things until now. Such as writing. And other stuff. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">December is ridiculously hectic. End-of-school-year activities and Christmas-is-coming functions fill the diary (at least people in the Northern Hemisphere are smart enough to have split these between July and December. Down 'ere, we pack 'em into a single mad, mad month). January is school holiday time, so I might squeeze 4 words per day between the demands of child-wrangling. And in Feb., work starts to pick up again. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">So, happy coincidence, NaNo seems to have been tailor made for me.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Except I put the <strong>No</strong> in NaNoWriMo. I’m not a joiner. I’m not even sure of the logistics, as I only skimmed through the web page. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Plus, I would have been cheating if I had, seeing as I already had about 10,000 words of a newish project (YA paranormal) done by Nov 1. My aim was to develop it this month. So far, so good. </span></span><br />
<br />
<span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">So far, I have exceeded the NaNo (daily) total- I can manage an average of 2000 words (more during school days, less on weekends). So I expect to have added about 60K words to my WIP by Dec 1 provided I dont get tanlged up in any inherant contradictions, or need to go back and change a character's motives or decide there's not enough substance in the plot to carry it over 25K words. And so on, the usual reasons I might hit a wall.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Nevertheless, knowing that others are powering through their manuscripts is inspiring, particularly as not everybody can dedicate as much time to it as I can. And I’m sure that if I got into it, I would be delighted for Ella of Eltham completing her MS within the allocated time. But the reality is that I don’t need the distraction of posting my own, and following others’ totals. I’m a solitary old grump, not a cheer squad. The other merit of the NaNo approach is that just writing until something happens is a good way to get into the writng zone. It's ok to go back and delete the first few useless paragraphs. Waiting for inspiration to hit is a great time waster. By "doing it", I get more done (well, duh).</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">However.... even without the burden of an employer, I've got a life. The "other stuff" gobbles up my time. Such as attending Professional Development seminars, to maintain my professional registration (I have a two day course and a one day course in the next two weeks); getting some much avoided dental work happening (it’s not just writing I procrastinate) and pushing myself to do regular exercise (the scales scream and run when I approach). So a month may sound like a long time, but it's far from empty.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">In other words, I still need to juggle my White Whine concerns.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I could still be persuaded to join the NaNo culture. What benefits have others found from being NaNo participants? Please share!</span></span></div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-52639913977194045122011-11-05T05:21:00.000-07:002011-11-05T05:21:38.567-07:00On writing<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">“How come you write so funny?”</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Something I heard many times as a child – pity it was my appalling handwriting and ridiculous pen-hold they were referring to, as opposed to my flawless wit.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Have a look at my party trick. That’s my thumb. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSYCy25Y3whYckTVdzmwayB5jWOz_M3YoDiaevtYDdVjzSV1xAkoRAevKoGhCHKgIHuRNlOo-rr3FEiCidY0ASddNLt4YyOj0qqOSfU39KicDp-8Sf8mIcyiAff3hDqBIlET1JYguZ9Z6q/s1600/IMG_0365.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200px" ida="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSYCy25Y3whYckTVdzmwayB5jWOz_M3YoDiaevtYDdVjzSV1xAkoRAevKoGhCHKgIHuRNlOo-rr3FEiCidY0ASddNLt4YyOj0qqOSfU39KicDp-8Sf8mIcyiAff3hDqBIlET1JYguZ9Z6q/s200/IMG_0365.JPG" width="150px" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I can effortlessly bend it like that. What used to be called double jointed is now “hypermobile”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, no I can’t lie on my tum and swing my toes in front of my face- that would be way cooler. I’d be posting that instead.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">It simply means the ligaments in my thumbs, and to a lesser extent, my fingers, aren’t good at their job of stabilising a joint. It means my fingers suck at controlling a pen. And I have to keep a death-grip on my pen to form legible letters. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">If you were to see anything I’d handwritten at school, you’d find the first few lines reasonably neat, followed by a rapid decline in the quality as my hand fatigued. After a few paragraphs, you’d swear somebody else started to write, because I’d shift the position of the pen in my hand, and the letters would slope in the opposite direction. The writing would be neat for a few lines, then deteriorate again, and I’d find a different way to hold my pen. And so on. A page of my handwritten text looked as if it was a joint effort of three or four (messy) people.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">As a teen, I stumbled across the “science” of graphology – or personality analysis through the study of handwriting. Yep, it’s as valid as personality analysis through astrology or phrenology (the study of bumps on your head), but I was not to know. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Seems that meek people have small handwriting, letters leaning forward (ie, to the right) are a sign of an impatient person, while you really can’t trust those who don't close the circles on their o’s, liars did that all the time! Those whose writing sometimes fails to stay on the line are easily led. And so on.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Well, my mixed up writing had dire implications: I was an introverted extrovert, meek, pushy and easily led. But I never lied. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">So there ended my study of graphology. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">In the early 90’s I shared a house with a German lady, who was applying for jobs. She duly sent off handwritten applications until the rest of us suggested it made her look slack. She was shocked. In Europe at the time, a graphological analysis was a standard personality screen of applicants. To send in a typed letter meant that you were hiding your inherently evil nature.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I don’t know if this practice is common today (if any Euro readers could comment, I’d appreciate it) but I guess no European company would have hired a fruit cake like me back then. Unless I could have persuaded a neat person to write my application for me. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">It all came back the other day, while watching my younger son’s fingers grasping his pencil so tightly his nails were white, and how laboured the whole task of writing was for him. Yep, his fingers are even more mobile than mine were.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Another introverted extrovert who was both meek and pushy....</span></span></div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-58105828641696857682011-11-01T22:58:00.000-07:002011-11-01T22:58:32.400-07:00Memory<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">A recent post about doing exercises to take myself back to childhood and relive the sensations got me thinking about memory and how trustworthy recollections could be.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Here’s an exercise. If you want to start an argument with a sibling (like that’s difficult), just ask him/her the simple question: “Who first came up with the idea to...” and fill the blank with a practical joke, executed jointly that worked beautifully; or a project you both put a lot of effort into as kids. Chances are both of you will claim credit for coming up with the idea, and get annoyed with the other for failing to recognise this simple historical fact. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Why? Because memory is highly fallible. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">We might experience memory like a tape recording. Rewind, press play, and the scene unfolds in front of us. The times when we’re unsure, we have to consciously reconstruct it, think harder, fill in blanks, and perhaps seek confirmation from others. The point is, even the times we feel quite sure of what happened, we are not replaying an undistorted scene. Because we recall by reconstructing the event. We follow a series of neural pathways, and jam together incidents and feelings that may not have actually happened in the sequence. Neural pathways are linked – associated. It’s easy to see how the pathway that portrays ourselves in a positive light is the one that gets chosen. It’s not hard to make a wrong turn and feel 100% confident that the memory is true.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">There’s proof for this view. A recent study asked people exiting Disneyland to respond yes or no, regarding which characters they’d seen during their visit. “Mickey Mouse?” “yes” “Donald Duck?” “yes” “Bugs Bunny?” – many responded “yes”. Impossible, because the wascally wabbit is not a Disney character. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Yet, because it had been suggested, and because cartoon characters are filed close together, a large portion of people accepted they had seen him. On follow up a few weeks later, the same people were asked to list the characters they had seen at the park. Many who said “yes” to having seen Bugs included him in their list, and felt no need to question their memory. Why? Because it’s perfectly plausible. They’ll probably<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>wonder why they failed to take a photo of Bugs on the day.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Now, I’m sure if the study had asked whether they’d seen Hannibal Lecter at Disneyland, few would have thought they had. Serial killers tend to not be closely associated with the Happiest Place on Earth. It’s harder to suggest something completely incongruous.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The thing is, misremembering happens every day, and it’s damned difficult to recognise when it does. As an example, many years ago, we had a pet rabbit. A girl came to visit and refused to hold him, as she’d been bitten by a bunny a few days earlier at a petting zoo. The other day, the long-deceased rabbit came up in conversation. The girl (now adult) scowled and said “I remember him, he bit me.” Well, one of us is misremembering here.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">So what’s that got to do with writing?</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Plenty, if you’re writing a memoir or a non-fiction piece which includes “eyewitness accounts”. Particularly if they refer to third parties.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">As for fiction... well. In my earlier blog entry, I said I was aiming for authenticity by immersing myself in sensations of childhood. But I started to question how true my memories were, and got tied up. Finally, I asked myself - does it really matter? Fiction is about making things up. Writers are notorious for trawling through their own and other people’s lives for incidents to include in their work. If I’m going to steal others’ stories, the least I can do is modify them, even if I don’t mean to.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">My only warning is: we tend to misremember incidents in a way that portrays us (and out pet bunnies) in a positive light. If we’re going to retell stories from our own childhoods, just expect siblings and close friends to feel we’re hogging credit for incidents they reckon they were responsible for! Let’s be generous and give kudos to others – even when we’re sure the credit belongs to us.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-48776755443515406162011-10-29T04:58:00.000-07:002011-10-29T05:00:31.485-07:00random ramblingsSometimes I experience things that I reckon could easily be worked into a story to add a laugh or pump it with authenticity. I duly store them away in a file, then struggle like anything to find their niche. And fail utterly. I'll share them with the lucky readers of my blog, and I'm more than happy to let people adopt them.<br />
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1. A friend came back from her travels and shared her tales and photos. The highlight had been a scenic helipcoper joy ride. "It was really scary - the helicopter had no doors!" The other listeners "ooohed", but I looked blank. "So how'd you get in if it had no doors?" (imagining a hatch underneath). She gave me a pitying look and explained that the cabin was permanently open on one side, to the amusement of the others.<br />
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2. It was a joint birthday party - the father was turning 40 and the son 4. The house was full! There were mountains of food. The littlies congregated around the adult table, eating sushi, pesto olives and other delicacies. The blokes hung around the kids' table and munched on chips and franks.<br />
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3. When my cat doesn't think I'm watchng, she's good buddies with the cat from next door. They sun themselves on the paving in the backyard, side by side, ocassionally rolling over to toast the other side (it's a tough life). But when I step outside, she immediately takes a swipe towards the other cat's nose. The other cat looks annoyed, but doesn't move. My cat duly lifts herself up and chases the other cat, who looks as if she's thinking "whatever" and saunters away. My cat looks pleased with herself. Clearly, it's her job to keep the yard free of other cats.Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-49147166649703527592011-10-22T05:30:00.000-07:002011-10-22T05:35:30.637-07:00Sexism<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I’m the proud auntie of five wonderful nieces and three fabulous nephews. And if you add the three nieces I gained from marrying, then you can see that’s a lot of birthday presents each year!</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I mention these people because (good aunt that I am) I’ve just returned from my nieces’ dance concert. Miss 3 and Miss 5 (nearly 6!) were proud to display their ballet skills. With their glittery hair and swishy dresses, they both looked like little princesses – and they knew it. These concerts are a riot, because the very little ones simply have no idea what they are doing. Some have the rabbit-in-headlight look on stage, others overperform. Many just struggle to remember what the heck they are supposed to be doing, and require a gentle prompt from an assistant to twirl or do the next move. At the end of the number, there’s always one kid frozen on stage when the others are thumping off, and the older girl pretends its part of the act as she pirouettes towards the recalcitrant one and shepherds her off. The Awww factor was High! </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">There were probably eighty or so kids in total, from about 12 classes. Two of whom were boys, and both of whom were the brothers of girls who were regular troupers. The Billy Elliots looked preschool age, and unlikely to have learnt that boys who dance rarely get looked on favourably at school. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">My two younger sons came to the concert, as there was no way that Mr 9 was going to watch ballet. Mr 7 thoroughly enjoyed it, he loves music and rhythm and appreciated the story that each of the acts told. He was given the option to leave as soon as his cousin’s piece had finished, but chose to stay to the end (Mr 5 started to nod-off half way). But when I asked Mr 7 if he wanted to learn dance, he responded with a horrified “no way!”. And, yes, there was some relief on my part.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">My boys learn Tae Kwan Do. The moves they learn are probably as demanding as the ballet steps, and as rhythmical (but sadly, no music is involved). Both sports are great exercises, build strength and flexibility, and challenge them to learn self-discipline and body awareness. Both provide kids with the opportunity to build self-esteem as a result of mastering a centuries-old discipline. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">There’s a minority of girls in the Tae Kwan Do class, probably a third, and I think it’s great that girls are being encouraged to learn to defend themselves. I wish I’d had a chance as a child. But on reflection about what my son and I had discussed, I felt uncomfortable. Martial arts are about asserting yourself. Ballet is about pleasing others. It’s ok for girls to take ownership of their bodies through self-defence, but not ok for boys to view their bodies as a means of self expression.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Before I had kids, I imagined that I would minimize sexual stereotyping in my own children, but I realise that has not happened. And my own stereotypical views are more ingrained than I thought. As a result, my gentle, artistic 7 year old boy has well and truly internalised the cultural messages about gender role. Nobody had to tell him “ballet is for girls”, he learnt that all by himself.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Subtle messages are directed at children daily. As a wannabe writer for kids, I need to scrutinise what I am saying in my narratives – or showing. Am I colluding with societal expectations, or am I challenging them? Are there better ways to challenge stereotypes than with a “Sally Soccer Star” type story with an overt message?</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Is this something other kids’ writers worry about?</span></span></div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-33556809761286564472011-10-06T16:05:00.000-07:002011-10-06T16:05:18.246-07:00Book review Sector C<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Sector C by Phoenix Sullivan. Available through Amazon and the usual outlets.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Sector C is a skilfully crafted narrative, a medical thriller. Set a few years into the future, Sector C takes us into a territory that the recent Swine Flu and Bird flu epidemics threatened to but did not did not – a fully blown, species jumping, fast acting pandemic. But instead of being the inevitable outcome of fast mutating viruses, this one was the accidental by-product of genetic engineering by humans.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The story follows Donna and Mike, a vet and an epidemiological investigator brought together when their respective investigations into unusual illnesses merged, and suggested the source of an outbreak. On a ranch with the probable “Patient Zero” they uncover the machinations of a profit-hungry company. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">My benchmark for a good story is not just sympathetic main characters – and Sector C has two of those – but three dimensional antagonists. Ms Sullivan has created a gem with Walt Thurman, a man unapologetically prepared to capitalise on the devastation he has inadvertently unleashed, and in Dr Volkov, the geneticist whose research work was directly responsible for the pandemic. I applaud Sullivan for her portrayal of the scientist with a God-complex, simultaneously compassionate and ruthlessly self-interested; devoted to finding a cure, yet prepared to withhold it from those most at need. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Sullivan deftly weaves her story between the personal accounts of families and ranchers devastated by the pandemic; a company in “damage control” (trying to contain the damage to their bottom line, not the population) and the two heroes who find themselves needing to dodge some unexpected creatures. She also paints a frightening picture of a world where no animal or food source can be trusted. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Overall, Sector C is a seamless balance of science and action. Sullivan has a knack of making scientific concepts easily accessible throughout the narrative without bogging the pace or sounding like a text book. Well done! </span></span></div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-90200532801771109552011-09-29T01:38:00.000-07:002011-09-29T01:38:21.152-07:00through the eyes of a child<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Is it possible to enter the mind of a child? I have strong memories of my childhood, and I don’t only mean of events, but of sensations and perceptions. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The child’s sensory world is different to the adults. Colours are more vivid, sounds more complex, and tastes sharper and more defined. This is not just me in reflective mood, I’m referring to observations that have been confirmed by scientific research. For example, in some experiments, adults were given a target colour, and asked to match it by adjusting the saturation and brightness of another panel. They had to identify that exact point at which there was no difference between the two samples. Most adults will perceive the two as identical earlier than a child does. This trend applied across most sensory modalities. Their eyes, ears, noses and tongues are sharper than ours. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">It’s the reason why the thunder of our childhoods was always more threatening, why the shadows moved more in a child’s darkened bedroom, and why spring was more joyful – the world is actually deeper for a child. It’s also why children will spit out a cabernet sauvignon and shriek at a whiff of gorgonzola cheese – to their senses these things are poison. Sorry to tell you, but we don’t have more refined palates, people. Instead, we’re stuck with dulled ones that need something as sharp as alcohol or blue cheese to awaken them. We can hold the red wine in our mouths long enough to rhapsodise about hints of blackcurrent, and pretend that’s a sign of sophistication.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Descriptions will always add depth to a narrative. Describing all sensory input is, I think, essential when writing for children. Given that their senses are clearer, it takes more effort to get it right. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I spent a while today musing about how things felt when I was little. I closed my eyes and sent myself back to a time when my feet didn’t touch the floor when I was on a chair, a time when most decisions were made for me. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I held the memory of the chill of a smooth window pane as I pressed my cheek to it, and watched my breath condense in a haze beside me. The freedom of bare feet on sand, the grains rubbing between my toes, the hot sand quickly becoming unbearable and having to hop hop hop to a towel.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Just some random moments. Difficult to capture – I’ll keep trying. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">After that, I’ll have a go at recreating the world through an adolescent’s dark coloured, hormonally charged lenses.</span></span></div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-32615535811456023532011-09-20T04:30:00.000-07:002011-09-20T04:35:26.052-07:00Separated by a common language...<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I’m feeling a little better about myself. I found a call for submissions for childrens’ stories, and ...completed something. The theme was Halloween, and I managed to squeeze a story into the 500 word limit. Lots of culling needed, but it got there. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">It was a strange theme to be writing about, as it’s an American custom. Although it's been transplanted in our backyard, it hasn’t quite taken root. </span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Some years the night of Oct 30<sup>th</sup> passes with no child doorknocking, sometimes we get one or two. One year, an American lady (who has since moved) organised all the local kids to go for a trick-or-treat. She went so far as to drop flyers in the letterboxes along our street asking people to tie a balloon to the gate on Halloween to show they were ok with a gaggle of excited children holding out their hands for sweets. She even provided the balloon!</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">My babies thought it was the best idea ever! Knock on the door and somebody hands you goodies that you don’t have to earn (as their <s>mean old witch</s> concerned mother expects).</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">So what did I put in my Halloween story? It was about a child, who misunderstood the term as “trickle treating” (well, it <em>is</em> a steady trickle of treats), and was mocked for it and excluded from the gang's trick-or-treat outing...and her revenge! </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">As a child, I was convinced it was "trickle treating"! In my defence, the tradition was non-existent when I was a wee lassie, but certainly prevalent on tv. I think adults saw it as somewhat audacious, but us kids could appreciate the merit of such a pastime. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">American television provided many hours of entertainment when I was a kid. I can remember a few more misunderstandings courtesy of that accent (no, I don’t have an accent, but you do!). I shall share these so that you can mock me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The song “for he’s a jolly good fellow” ends with “and so say all of us” over here, but folks on American shows mysteriously sang about “nobody candy nigh”. Huh? </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I was quite flummoxed about why girls waving pom-poms should be “chair leaders” (and why such an activity was highly sought after). What were they thinking? </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">However, I was anticipating one day visting that wonderful city that was built near a beach that was so wide they named the town in honour of that feature. You know the one – Sandy Ago.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Ok, maybe I should have had my ears checked. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">But, grasshoppers, this was centuries before the internet could answer all conundrums at the tap of a keyboard. Even as a teen, some of the mysteries of the US persisted. In Paul Zindel’s novels, some of his delinquent MCs spent some time “hanging moons”. What such an activity might have entailed, I truly had no idea. It’s not that this pastime wasn’t indulged in around here – possibly with greater frequency than in the States – but we gave it a far more descriptive title: "flashing a brown eye". </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Come on, ya gotta admit, even if you’d never heard of it, you would have gotten the gist of it straight away. However, that part of the vernacular seems to have since disappeared, probably due in no small way to young Bart Simpson.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I'm not the first to complain about the Americanisation of global cultures, and prob wont be the last. But, hey, if I get paid for a story about Halloween, I won’t be carrying on like I’ve got a ‘roo loose in the top paddock. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></span></div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-9158424369772175072011-09-15T04:41:00.000-07:002011-09-15T18:41:22.851-07:00the f-wordThis is a topic that every writer has to tackle during the course of serious wordsmithing... fatigue!<br />
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Those of us who earn a living not-writing know it well. Writing fiction is as demanding as a second job. Sure we've all heard tales about bestselling authors who held a high-flying full-time job when they were unpublished, and yet managed to churn out airport sized manuscripts at night or early in the morning when the world was sleeping. I'm thinking of the likes of Peter Carey and John Grisham here. <br />
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I happen to spend some hours on the computer during the day to fulfil my obligations to the people who pay me. In the evening, I need to step into mothering mode. This job tends to not involve a computer screen, but it's still pretty busy - making sure that a nutritious meal finds it way into the kids, and that they get cleaned, and have done their required reading, music practice and other bits of homework. Sometimes I step into Tiger-Mom mode and attempt to give them additional tasks to do in order to challenge them further to achieve their full potential or some such nonsense. <br />
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Then, once the blood has been mopped from the floor, and the darlings are curled up in their beds, I try to squeeze some creativity from my brain. That's the point at which the f-word hits. Sure, I swear and curse, but that does nothing to remove the fog (another f-word) and urge to call it a night. I reduce the brightness on my screen, and that stops me from squinting. I also zoom in to make the words larger. And try to write. I aim for 500 words on a working day and 1000 for a non-working day. Targets are such optimistic things, yeah?<br />
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Ok, so I'm having a whine here. I'm not the only person who has to live in the real world and chooses to write. Unless you're living off inherited wealth, or have a machne in the basement that either cranks out more time or more money, and you're not forced to keep busy for 7 and 1/2 hours per day, then chances are you can relate exactly to what I'm talkin' about. <br />
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I'm wondering what people do when the urge to shut their eyes takes becomes overwhelming. Do you give in to it, or just push through? Does it involve caffeine or stealing your kids' ADHD medication? Physical exercise? Yoga/ meditation? Watching really bad tv and consequently feeling superior and inspired? (or does cr*p tv just make you want to scream another f-word?)<br />
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So far, one thing that has helped is to change the technology I use. I've come across a wonderful innovation that is low glare, portable and very energy efficient. I'm talking about pen and paper! Sadly, the spell check and word count is completely lousy. It also means that I need to transcribe it back into a word document when I can finally face a screen again without wanting to cry. <br />
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The good news is that the act of writing is different to typing, and just being away from a lap-top seems to nudge my brain into producing something.<br />
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Please, share your strategies for battling the f-word...Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-44961773573181879732011-09-10T03:42:00.000-07:002011-09-10T04:01:40.522-07:00Insults!<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Words are a writer’s tools. In skilled hands they can inspire and stir passions and incite revolutions and bring down governments. They can flatter the powerful or crystallize the collective resentments of the powerless. They can be woven into tangled webs that mislead and manipulate. They can draw attention away from the issue and trap the unwary. Beware fine print!</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">By their own nature, they are imprecise. One single word can evoke a number of different feelings or associations, depending on the individual listener/ reader. I might think that being compared to a cat is a compliment. Others might see it as an insult. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">An unskilled user can mangle and mash words, and jam them into a context they had never been in before. Or do I mean a poet? Gosh, I’m not sure. Genius or idiot?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The line can be thin.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span>At worse they fall flat. A poor metaphor grates like a sliding door. And only those of us who have been irritated by a sliding door that squeaks and jams every time it gets used would appreciate that one, otherwise, that metaphor would grate like a ...</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Words with the same linguistic root can take on vastly different meanings. And w</span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">hen they jump between languages the real fun starts! An “offense” (noun) in French is a mere insult, an affront (something the French are familiar with - and they have both insult and affront in their vocabulary, but clearly required another term with that meaning) but in English, an “offense” is cause for arrest (although something "offensive" may not be). The prefix “in” in French reverses the meaning of a word, but only does so when it feels like it in English. As my (French) mother found out when she got a funny look asking for “in-salted” butter!</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">“Dilettante” is another example. In Italian, it’s a compliment; it refers to one who is well read and very knowledgeable about a multitude of issues and topics. In English, it damns with faint praise. It suggests the person is a dabbler and not serious about anything. “Dilettante in furs” is particularly insulting (or do I mean insalting?) referring to a young woman of a privileged background who slums it for a while with a bunch of revolutionaries. Because, of course, a young woman would have absolutely no ideals or wish to explore worlds different from her own background, now would she? No, she’d just be passing time waiting for the rich husband to show up. And there's no equivalent term for a young man who passes time with revolutionaries.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">My point is – I’m feeling like a dilettante at the moment. In both senses of the word (although without furs). Yes, I try to read widely across a number of fields. Arts, sciences, medicine, history. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">But am I just a dabbler? I dabble in writing. I procrastinate. I have hardly written any fiction over the past few months, and suspect that I’m not up to the self discipline and rigour needed to see a project through. I go and read across my fields of interest rather than sit down and write.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
<span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">How long can I get away with calling it “research” before I have to face the fact that I might just be a dilettante and not a serious writer? Or have I just insulted dilettantes?</span></span></div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-65311211724850148852011-08-24T06:04:00.000-07:002011-08-24T06:04:38.514-07:00Hey! I'm a guest on somebody's blog!Ok, I'm a softie for anythng with paws. It's its small and furry, my interest is piqued. And if it purrs, well, I wanna take it home. Ask me about my darlings (past or present) and I could <strike>bore</strike> entertain you for an entire day. Click over to Confessions of An Animal Junkie (<a href="http://animaljunkie.blogspot.com/">here</a>), for one such cat story. <br />
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The story's true, but recounted in the voice I used for my one and only pub'd piece, "My Own Secret Dinosaur" (the main difference being that I had the cats as an adult, but the story is told through the eyes of a child). But as I'm really eight years of age on the inside, aaah, writing it that way was not a huge leap. <br />
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And if you enjoyed the blog piece, and would like to read the Dinosaur story, drop me a line privately and I'll get a copy over to you.Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7180324998955182830.post-76347928996965638912011-08-12T05:21:00.000-07:002011-08-12T05:21:44.397-07:00On planning<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I’m a panster writer. That means I always make sure that I’m wearing undies before I start writing. (Unlike some degenerates who write in the skin, I guess).</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Ok, ok, some probably see <em>me</em> as a degenerate, because plans are a bit like maps, and most maps are meaningless to me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> They exist to confuse and taunt me. My visuo-spatial skills are non-existent. I often head off 180° from the direction I’m supposed to be going. </span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Panster means writing by the seat of your pants, doing away with unnecessary frills like plans and schedules and time-lines. </span></span><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Sometimes I do plan. The concept of a plan sounds very sensible. But the bolshie in me snorts at the plan and asks my past self who does she think she is, bossing me around and telling my present self what to do. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">A plan for me often works like a reversal. Whatever I plan to write, you can be sure I end up writing about anything but (veering off 180 degrees, probably). So doing diagrams and charts with little arrows pointing everywhere ends up being a complete waste of time. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">In my days as a student, I knew I would waste precious exam time by planning how I would structure my response to a question. I either knew the answer and it would come pouring out of me, (and I would go on for a few pages – not necessarily coherently) or I would realise I knew only a few related fragments that I had no way of integrating into a whole, and write the lyrics to Monty Python’s Lumberjack song ten times instead, before passing out and reviving myself in the pub. (Most people tend to pass out <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">after</i> a lengthy session at the pub, but that’s just me, I often do things the wrong way. I planned my wedding and ended up having the honeymoon before the nuptials. Ah, well.)</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Often, when I sit in front of the keyboard, I have no idea what I’m going to write about. But as I have a huge phobia of blank screens, I hurry to fill it with<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>- anything. Garbage mostly.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Some people start writing with a vision. It could be a place or an era. Not me, I have enough trouble visualising where I’ve left my keys, let alone how somebody’s home or clothing might look. If I try to desribe how a scene looks, I end up confusing everybody, especially me.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I always start with voice. I let the character talk. And talk and talk. Sometimes I have to tell it to shut-up. Often I let it talk to others. Their conversation will tell me a lot about what they want, and what’s stopping them from getting it. That’s the germ of a plot, and I run with it and explore some blind alleys, but my characters are often kind enough to take me somewhere interesting. And unexpected. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Maybe it depends on your definition of a plan. Does a notion count as a plan? I may start with a vague idea about what I’d like to see happen in the story. Say, a kid turning the table on the bullies. I’ll dive in and write an inordinate amount about my character and his/her nemesis. In writing about them I discover their motives, their voices. They have conversations, arguments. And in doing so I gradually learn how the bully gives the poor MC a hard time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I’m really lucky, I’ll discover the chink that lets the MC suddenly (and hopefully magnificently) make the bully look like a complete imbecile. In front of those they were wanting to impress. Or I might end up with a tale of finding lost treasure. Or the whole thing may ramble with no hope of reaching a resolution this millennium. Depends on how nice my characters are being.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Maybe I do plan. Does the extremely rough draft of a completed tale count as a plan? A very lengthy and slowly worked out plan, perhaps? A plan that gets chewed on and thrown into the blender a gazillion times before I have the satisfaction of crying “finito” (and startling the cat)? </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">I know I’m a <s>strange person</s> individual who does things her own way. It would be nice to hear about others' methods, even if only to reassure me that in this field, as well as every other field I've tried, I'm a complete and utter misfit. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span lang="EN-AU"><span style="font-family: Arial;">How do other people write? </span></span></div>Jo-Annhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15705983780352542190noreply@blogger.com5